The Legion of Doom!

Legion – Scott Stewart

It has a comic book kind of themes to it; you can imagine this being a series where the lead character over a period of time saves the world and everything. Archangel Michael, yes that legend, comes to Earth to save something from somebody that could somehow something something. Yeah i didn’t really care, as soon as the film had an old woman say the c word. Yes the c word. Please, just watch it for that scene. It’s hilarious. The actress who played her is now my favourite actor of all time, better than Paul Dano! I know, it’s that good. But i guess i should review the whole film, not just that scene, but if they could of, give that woman a whole film just to swear, bite people and just generally cause fucking havoc.

The wonderful Paul Bettany stars, who i rate for the actor; I’ve always appreciated his work, even though sometimes it shows us that he has only been picked for his looks. But when he’s on form, he really does steal it. And making this type of film in Hollywood, a clear showing how he can do action. How he can be the next Stallone or Willis. But i think he’s better than that. I don’t see from looking at the script, the lack of dialogue and sometimes even decent dialogue can’t be seen. The story follows a woman who is pregnant and the kid could stop the world from dying? Or something or about how God wants the kid to die because of what it means? And Michael comes down from heaven and helps the child survive a brutal killing from hundreds of zombie humans who have been taken over by God to help kill the child. They hold up in a diner in the middle of a desert with the guy from Transformers, the woman from Grey’s Anatomy, a girl from The OC and Dennis Quaid. It’s an ensemble cast from various other things and it’s shocking to see the normally decent Quaid in this type of vehicle. It ends the way you think, with a lot of random violence and action.

Looking at the basic idea for the film, it could easily work, but sadly, there is nothing in it. It had the same fate for 30 Days of Night. Many people believe that a great idea leads to an awesome film, sadly not the case. Although i quite enjoyed 30 Days Of Night, but its swings and roundabouts. Check this film out if you have nothing to do, actually wait, i don’t even suggest doing that, there are millions of great films out there to watch, don’t waste your time (but do watch the scene with the old lady, it’s bad shit funny!).

5/10

Simon Childs

I love Woody Harrelson!

Zombieland – Ruben Fleischer

Watching this film for the second film after seeing it in the cinema and then again on Blu-Ray, you find little things that you may not have seen on the first viewing. This happens for most films. You pick up on things that improve the viewing, showcasing the acting or the direction. But sometimes, watching a film again, it makes it show its true face, you know, when you watch it again and it becomes laughable. Like recently, checked out the director’s cut Blu-Ray version of Watchmen. It was bad. I remember seeing it at the IMAX in London, and it was good, it wasn’t amazing, but it was good. Now i agree with some people saying it’s very boring. Anyway, back to Zombieland, another dose of Jesse Eisenberg with the recent review of Adventureland, here he plays a more confident type, but still shit at love. He’s the new version of Michael Cera, the middle-class version. It’s strange how both these actors have made a living being the uncomfortable geeky type. They both play it well, but it will get to a point where they will become utterly annoying. I love both actors, so we’ll see how it fairs.

Anyway, back to the review, and the plot of the film is simple, Eisenberg who plays Columbus, lives in a world infested with zombies and meets Tallahassee, Woody Harrelson’s character and they form a friendship in helping them get to a certain place. On the travel to these places they bump into the sisters Little Rock and Wichita, played by Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin, yes the kids from Superbad and Little Miss Sunshine. They all have place names to show where they are from, so they can show how far they’ve travelled trying to find a place to stay and hole up because of the millions of zombies after their flesh. Each actor brings a different style of comedy and acting, and it works brilliantly, all actors started from independent films that focused on acting and showcased how good these cats are and here they are allowed to show their funny bones with Harrelson stealing the show. A lot better than his strange cameo in 2012. Also look out for the hilarious Bill Murray cameo, which almost steals the whole film.

It’s a great film to check out with friends and it’s a decent piece to add to the zombie survival genre, being genuinely funny, not as good as Shaun of the Dead, but it’s very close to being. Out of the two, Adventureland and Zombieland, i prefer Zombieland, so go check it out for the weekend if your bored.

7/10

Simon Childs

Any film with Ryan Reynolds is a given. Eisenberg for Superman!

Adventureland – Greg Mottola

Jesse Eisenberg is a hero of mine. And with heroes, i can’t really say anything bad about them. And luckily, there is nothing bad to say about him, his acting, his career and especially this film, as it’s really great. It’s a lovely summer film, with an iconic soundtrack, a great cast and some really funny scenes. Maybe the inclusion of K-Stew or Kristen Stewart will want to rip your eyes out of your socket, but surprisingly she isn’t as annoying here then when she’s gallivanting in a fucking forest with that Pattinson lad. Here she kinda owns it a little. But when the cast around you are Eisenberg, Bill Hader, Kristin Wiig and mother fucking Dead Pool himself, Ryan Reynolds, its hard not to be funny. It’s gonna be in the air most of the time. I loved Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Parlour on Trouble, and Reynolds was fucking funny. I grew up with him. And then starred in amazing films like Blade 3, Van Wilder, Waiting, Just Friends, Smoking Aces, The Nines, Defiantly, Maybe, X-Men Origins: Wolverine and filming at the moment, The Green Lantern, sure, it sounds like a shit career, but i loved like 90% of those. I respect the man, he married Scarlett Johansson for fuck sake, and the dude deserves credit.

Set in 1987, it follows Eisenberg’s character, James Brennan, after graduating from college and finding that he wants to go to Europe and then University, he finds a summer job at Adventureland, the local amusement park owned by Hader and Wiig. There he meets Kristen Stewart’s character and they instantly have a connection of being wandering lonely souls who are stuck in a shit town. Throw in Ryan Reynolds, a local player on the amusement park who sleeps with pretty much anyone, and the relationship of Reynolds and Stewart is teased in front of Eisenberg and really, just little scenes that are sometimes funny, sometimes romantic occur. It’s a decent film, with a decent plot, we’ve seen it before, but it’s the way the characters act and the interactions that make this film what it is. The soundtrack as well is very memorable, and the older audiences will defiantly recognise some of the hits.

Overall, it’s a good summer film, it has set pieces that will make you smile, and think of the summers you’ve had, chasing the girl or guy of your dreams, listening to certain songs or albums, going to parties meeting new people, drinking copious amounts of booze, wearing shorts and snazzy new t-shirts and wearing sunglasses all the time and my favourite, having most of the time you scratching your body because of either having hay fever or you’ve been rolling around in the grass. Yes, a summer of wonderful fucking times. The stereotype of the summer. Why don’t they show a real summer, most of the time too hot or raining, staying inside, not being able to sleep because of the heat, no more roast dinners, too poor to go out. It’s really lame.

6/10

Simon Childs

Avatar meets Terminator Salvation: The common link: Sam Worthington!

Clash of the Titans – Louis Leterrier

Seeing this film on the back burner of a great film-centric weekend with Shutter Island and Kick-Ass, coming into the film i had doubts. I knew it wasn’t going to be great from the reviews and from the trailers I’ve seen. And plus my mother wanted to see this. And knowing her choice of films to watch at the cinema, the last film i took her to see was Inkheart. Yes Inkheart. I know. Shocking. And before that was The Mummy series too. All of them. But she did love Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. But still. Mummy and Inkheart. It was horrible. And this film fell into that category of being an action adventure film taking the viewer into a new place, into a new timeframe, and just letting their imagination be freed for an hour and a half. And that what Clash of the Titans tried to do. It tried to reimaging the original using better graphics and teaches the audience about Greek mythology. But because of my addictive God of War playing. I have a totally different perspective of the tales of Greek mythology. And I’m sure all of you reading this knows what I’m talking about!

The film follows Perseus, a fisherman, after his mother and father with children are killed by Hades after a statue of Zeus is destroyed by civilians of Argos. It then sets a motion of events leading Perseus to question his birth and go on a mission to find weapons to kill Hades including getting the head of Medusa and using it to kill the Kraken. I won’t reveal the massive twist, but it’s obvious. Sam Worthington plays Perseus with Liam Neeson as Zeus and Ralph Fiennes as Hades. It’s a pretty great casting choice for Zeus and Hades and i would have loved to see more of these two. Just fighting or some shit. It was pretty good to see. But alas no Poseidon or Hercules were seen; disappointment. You’ll see throughout the film, a cast of relatively known people who have you racking your brains in having seen in past films like the villain from Casino Royale, the two off Skins and some other geezers looking hard. Sam Worthington plays a cross between the character in Terminator and Avatar. Shocking really, i think i know why he got the role. He must surely make a better film soon, maybe something that isn’t the same.

It’s a film to see at film with a group of people, loads of popcorn, maybe a few drinks. It’s fairly gory and some scenes will make you numb. For an action film, it lacks action. Which is strange to say, but the set pieces just feel the same, like the whole scorpion set piece which just reminds you of Transformers. The ending is not built up and not realistic. The Kraken is fucking massive; i don’t understand how one wave he made would not have just destroyed that fucking city in the first place. Makes no sense!

5/10

Simon Childs

Trailer Watch XI

18th April - 25th April

Sorry for the long delay on the latest trailers, but we wanted to wait until really great trailers were released before we gave you the latest and greatest that has hit the web. Also to celebrate, this is our 50th post! We've made it to half a century! How amazing. We hope you enjoy the trailers:

1. Scott Pilgrim vs The World



2. The Thorn In The Heart



3. Wild Grass



4. Stolen



5. Artois The Great



6. Dinner For Schmucks

RANTBOX REVIEW - Alice in Wonderland

Hey readers,

This has taken a little while to be sent because of how slow Michael works, but here is another edition of RANTBOX REVIEW where our "good" friend Michael Leroi beats down a movie into submission and then pisses all over it. This week is Tim Burton's, or T-Dizzle as he is known on the streets, Alice in Wonderland.

New Moon: ohhhhhheeeeehhhhhhwwwwwweeeeeeeooooooo

New Moon – Chris Weitz

The title to this review sums up my brain watching the latest in the Twilight saga, New Moon, because as a close personal friend of mine explained, Twilight is just Rob Pattinson porn for children. It’s evolved now into this cultural phenomenon where girls post videos on YouTube about how they love the books and films and they show the world their appreciation by crying, by laughing or by being angry. It’s strange to think of a world without this now, even though it’s only been three, four years, it feels like it’s been there forever. And i for one can’t stand it. I’m going to admit, i liked Twilight, it was a decent film, parts of it grated on me, but i thought it was a trashy teenage drama piece that had good music. The soundtrack was a major draw for me and the ways they used it was good. It could have been better. The acting in the first one was okay, but great, not Oscar worthy, but when the text is so poorly written, you know that it won’t be as good. The second in the series New Moon follows this trend of having decent music in an otherwise, shocking piece of filmmaking, where literally nothing happens. I don’t see what all the fuss is about. Nothing of interest happens. Just some girl who is torn between a vampire and a werewolf. And then some stuff at the end about him wanting to die. I wasn’t really paying attention. I was very close to falling asleep and that’s only happened in one film: Pirates of the Caribbean 3. And that was shocking!

The plot is thin, very thin on the ground, it seems like filler for the story, not a carry on like the Harry Potter series is where it carefully teases things, leaves some other juicy parts for later films but has interesting plot twists and turns throughout. Surely looking at how they made Twilight and the series of films, Harry Potter is a massive influence into doing a large series, but it seems they haven’t taken the advice from Potter and crew and tried to create an eerie piece of romance that doesn’t quite work. It’s lacking a lot. So you probably know what happens or what has happened before, Bella, a bit of a slag if I’m honest, first loves Ed, who is a vamp, then you have Billy bob, i mean Jacob, a werewolf, who loves Bella. So it’s a bit of love triangle, I’m just waiting for Jacob to fall in love with Edwardz and it will be lovely.

But yeah, it’s pretty much that, a story of a young romance, squashed by factors like being a vampire, other vampires wanting you dead, the one you love wanting to die because he thought you was dead, puberty, you know the normal things. If you must see it, watch it drunk. More fun.

4/10

Simon Childs

A punch to the balls, and a kick to the face!

Kick-Ass – Matthew Vaughan

Having not read the comic but being an avid comic book reader and seeing the trailers, the teasers, the posters, the screenshots, everything to do with the film, i was really looking forward to seeing the film, so much so, i saw it with a good group of my friends, we got in early, we waited. We all wanted to see this film together, not getting an advantage over the other. Laughing and awing at the same time. So i can officially say: Kick-Ass is kick-ass! You’ve read the reviews of how amazing this film is, you probably think it’s been hyped way too much, but i really think its fucking amazing. It may be the best film I’ve seen in a long time. It’s on the same level as Dark Knight and that’s high. Dark Knight is an instant 10 out of 10, so your gonna be looking forward to the rating i give it in the end. But just to let you know, that since seeing the film, i have brought the comic book, a special edition poster and will hopefully get t-shirts with slogans on, that’s how much i love the film.

The film follows Dave Lizewski, a geeky teenager, a nobody in his high-school, a hormone fuelled loser with loser friends and a loser life until he becomes Kick-Ass, at first a loser superhero, but becomes more, and through meeting people like him, captures the imagination of the people and helps solves people’s problems and captures the bad guys. I won’t reveal too much of the story because you’ll defiantly need to go peek it out for yourself. Along with the story of Dave, the sub plots of Hit Girl and Big Daddy have been the most publicised by Hit Girl and her shenanigans throughout. At point, yes, she does this, she says the word: cunts. I know, it’s strong, and i apologise if anybody is offended, but it’s perfect. The audience laughed for at least 5 minutes just hearing her mutter the word. It’s well needed in the scene and it’s offensive. Big Daddy, with the Adam West-like voice, played by Nicholas Cage, who at the moment is getting attacked for the slew of bad films he has made recently, finally shows the world the guy has acting chops. He’s always had it, he just needed the right platform, look at Con Air or Face Off!

The other performances worth noting in the film, Aaron Johnson, who plays Dave, Chloe Grace Moretz who plays Hit Girl, as everyone has said has got a great career in front of her, unless she steers away from shit films that will easily tempt her to be in. Mark Strong is great as the lead villain and Christopher Mintz-Plasse as his geeky, nerdy son is perfect, the combination of those two works so well, it shows that both actors have grown out of their typecasts of being a gangster boss, sleaze ball and a geeky, nerdy kid. That may sound sarcastic, but i genuinely think they did well in the film. So please, go watch this film, enjoy two hours and fucking tell the world of how great the film is. This is what people go into the film business to do!

10/10

Simon Childs

Let’s do the Twist

Shutter Island – Martin Scorsese

A weekend starts these three reviews, with seeing a film on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, i start with the psychological horror film Shutter Island, staring Leonardo Di Caprio and directed by the legendary Martin Scorsese. A film not seen in his line of work, a complete departure to what he has made, but it’s a welcomed change. I would never have expected Scorsese to have made this film. Looking at The Departed to this, you can see the director has been thinking about trying different genres, trying to open audiences to more varied plots and storylines, unfortunately, this plot, and especially the twists, can be seen from a mile away. The ending is obvious, because the audience have seen it before. Is the lead character really crazy or not. But what makes this film great, is the performances from Leonardo Di Caprio and Ben Kingsley, and special mention to a favourite actor of mine, Mark Ruffalo, they all sell the plot, they make the characters believable and they add a new twist to the genre.

The film revolves around Leonardo Di Caprio visiting an island for the mentally insane, called Shutter Island, he’s been called to investigate a missing inmate and unravels a conspiracy, or so he thinks. I can’t give much away, but you’ll soon realise what happens or what will happen. It’s not as hard to understand say like Lost, where shit will happen but from what direction! I wouldn’t class this film as a horror either, but many people have. It wasn’t that scary from the way the trailers have made it to be. There is a couple of disturbing images like bodies and drowning people, but it’s not the standard horror affair. You can defiantly see the influence of classic Hollywood cinema with Alfred Hitchcock and his horror films playing a part in how it affects the audience through emotion and the trick of not revealing until the end, where the pieces fit together to form the whole puzzle. Also the influence of Stanley Kubrick is used here in the music, which is top draw, a great feature in creating the eerie Shutter Island.

Overall, a good film, with strong performances, great direction, powerful music but the ending is obvious and not as scary as you may think it to be. A good film for a Friday too, but the next film, Kick-Ass will be a favourite of being the film of the weekend. Who knows, maybe Clash of the Titans will come out of nowhere and show the rest a right hander that will knock them out of the park. How many sayings and metaphors in that sentence? Too many!

7/10

Simon Childs

Un-Fucking-Believable

2012 – Roland E mmerich

Let me just get this out of my system first: WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT ON FUCKING EARTH! HOW THE FUCK DOES HE SURVIVE ALL THAT SHIT AT THE BEGINNING! HOW CAN A LIMO OUT RUN A FUCKING DESTRUCTION OF A CITY WITH FALLING FUCKING SKYSCRAPERS AND SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK! HOW CAN A CAMPER VAN OUT RUN A VOLCANO, THAT’S FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE! AND THEN HOW DOES A SHITTY PLANE NOT GET TOTALLYED! THIS IS BULLOCKS!

Okay, that was most of the anger out of the way, now onto the review of 2012. Wait i have more, especially these two lines of dialogue: “That’s a big plane” which is followed by: “Its Russian” with a huge stereotypical Russian smirk on his face. Almost felt like dialogue out of Rocky 4. And the Russians guys sons like the guitarist from My Chemical Romance! Anyway, the film follows the world ending. Yep, its that simple. And some character do shit and everything. It stars John Cusack, Danny Glover and some other shit people. Well the three main people i like, actor wise is Cusack, Glover and the lovely Thandie Newton. John Cusack hasn’t been in a good movie since High Fidelity back in 2000. Yep, 12 years ago! Danny Glover as the president is pretty awesome, fucking Riggs should be vice president, and the world would not end then! And what i don’t appreciate is, how can a fucking annoying plastic surgeon and John Cusack survive near death on several occasions but you get both Glover, first he stays behind to help America (admirable), gets covered in volcanic dust, and along with the dust from a failing building then has a megstsunami hit him with a tanker too. And the black piano player didn’t deserve to go either! And the gorgeous Thandie Newton, what is she doing here, clearly just a pay check for her.

As like all Emmerich other works, its looks are better than its story and plot. It’s pointless. You can take a basic premise that sounds interesting, make it look okay, but still is shit. Three separate place going off instances. It’s shocking. People that would be interested in this film are people wanting the world to end: its porn for the destructionist. Just two and half hours worth of what the world would be like if it shit itself. Yeah, just buildings collapsing, roads becoming waves of concrete, volcanoes exploding, the human civilisation getting fucked up.
I think from what I’ve written above shows you that in simple terms, this film is shit.

3/10

Simon Childs

It’s no Cirque du Soleil but it’s not a Circus of Horrors either!

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant – Paul Weitz

Having read the first book in this series, i didn’t have high hopes of it being a decent adaptation, because of the amount of the films that have come from kids books, only two series come to mind that have been okay and mild success, you may have heard of them, Harry Potter and Twilight? No, nor did i until i googled it. Anyway, the success rate is slim, which lead me to believe that this wouldn’t worked and being backed into a corner, the film came out fighting. It may have its lapse moments, with a few dodgy actor choices, but overall it’s a good film. For teenagers and young people, it’s entertaining and for the adults, John C. Reilly kills it. I know it’s the comedy guy from Step Brothers and Talladega, but he really pulls it off and without him, i think the film wouldn’t of been as good. He steals it; i just wish they had more of him.

Anyway, the film follows, based on the books written by Darren Shan, which is the name of the lead character, which is strange, kinda like Lemony Snicket, but less weird. It follows Darren, a young teenager, as he meets a vampire, Crepsley and becomes his assistant. Other people are not happy with this and threaten to kill them both, some bald geezer and some other British vampires, plus a war is about to happen between these vampires, ones who eat and kill humans and ones who don’t. It’s a different take on the vampire genre. It all starts with Steve and Darren, like secret best friends, as they like weird things like spiders and the undead. Steve is really unsettling for some reason, i don’t know if it’s the actor, but just something about him makes me shiver in a horrible horrible way. You’ll notice what i mean if you do check this film out. The plot is simple, but the film is made in an honest and decent manner, which leads it to be a good adaptation and be an okay film.

It has moments that are different and have good direction, but i guess that’s because it’s Paul Weitz, who you can kinda trust with these sorts of franchises. William Defoe also appears as a camper version of Vincent Price, which is no mean feat, I’ve seen him in Daybreakers and now this, it feels like a Dafoe weekend, i might have to watch Spider-Man, Life Aquatic and possibly Antichrist, but i might skip that last one, sick in my mouth. Back to the film, it’s decent, it has its moments, it will keep you entertained but it won’t push you.

6/10

Simon Childs

-Insert witty title involving title of film- I can’t, film is amazing!

Away We Go – Sam Mendes

This film was totally under the radar for me, i had no clue that this film existed, only until i was “researching” Emily Blunt, and ended up finding out that she is now engaged, sad times! But it wasn’t all bad as she is with John Krasinski, the star and my favourite Jim Halpert, of the American version of The Office, which I’m a massive fan of. It was like finding out Katy Perry had got engaged to Russell Brand, i was disappointed but it felt right, it just felt like the better man won. Anyway, after looking at Krasinski’s Wikipedia, i found that he had stared in a movie directed by Sam Mendes and i thought it would be cool to check out. And here we are. The review of Away We Go. And i can honestly say I’m glad i read it on his Wikipedia, the film is wonderful. It’s a gem, something that I’ve hasn’t said about a film since Garden State, Lars and the Real Girl or Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Its suits that category.

Away We Go follows a couple, Verona and Burt, with a child on the way, realise that their life isn’t good and that they are struggling, so they decide that they must live somewhere else to raise the child, and find the perfect place for them, which leads to a journey to different places in the US. These trips lead to different families and people living in different ways, which some they agree with and some they don’t. It’s a great tale of a modern family trying to find their way in life, the main two are perfect and gentle and witty, it’s something any person would love to have and it affects you straight away. The settings are wonderful, the cities look enchanting and the slow pace is somewhat mysterious but it fits the mood. I love this film, i really do, it’s a gem that without the wonders of Wikipedia, i would have never found which I’m glad. Wikipedia is officially the best thing on the internet! Except for facebook; and nme online; and empire online; and aint it cool news. And of course this website. And how can you forget porn. I guess it’s in the top 10, but it has to bear all the rest first before it can be taken seriously. Sorry that went way off track, so watch Away We Go, it may change your life, like it did mine, like Into the Wild did, like Garden State did.

It’s a high rating but it deserves it!

9/10

Simon Childs

This certainly isn’t any Twilight, R-Patz Shit!

Daybreakers - Michael and Peter Spierig

The world’s interest in vampires as always been there but with releases of the vampire mega series Twilight, True Blood and the new fascination of young cool vampires and how sexy they look, film production companies started listening. They saw the little gap in the market to keep making films that feature zombies such as 30 Days of Night and now Daybreakers. A film about vampires but if the world knew about it and how it would change so everyone survives. It’s clever in how it sees the world in a vampire crisis, with the use of blood banks and putting blood in drinks and how the human race is dying. It’s defiantly more realistic than Twilight and all those other bullshit vampire tales. But sadly i wish i could keep going with the compliments but i can’t. The acting is shocking, the dialogue is lacking, pacing is off, ending is poor, but the effects are okay, the settings are good, it has spots of being decent but is plagued with being average. If you mixed The Matrix, well the shit second and third versions and mix it with Blade, this is kinda it. Loosely.

The film follows the story of a doctor played by Ethan Hawke, who i quite like as an actor, decent actor, who is a vampire, the whole world are vampires except for a couple of humans who haven’t turned and are against it. Also there are some vampires who haven’t had enough blood and turned into mutants. Looks fucked up. So Hawke is a doctor who accidently crashes into a convoy of humans and wishes to help them. Helps them escape. Hawke’s brother appears and he’s a vampire solider who hunts humans for blood. Hawke meets up with a man who used to a vampire and finds a cure; the Earth sun, which we all fought, was bad for them. Also Sam Neill plays Hawke’s boss and always goading the brothers into doing dirty dirty things. A complete change from the guy from Jurassic Park. And he dies too! Did i give away the ending too much?

Any who, back to Daybreakers, it’s okay in form but lacks in story and script. It’s a film to turn off to, but has set pieces that will impress. Maybe not the best work from the people involved but good filler for a week’s release. I look forward to many more shit vampire films that look at it in a different angle, what next werewolf films or Frankenstein’s monster, but young people, young cool sexy Frankenstein Monster. Played by Robert fucking Pattinson or maybe that kid from High School Musical?

5/10

Simon Childs

Trailer Watch X

Hey readers, this is an honour for the site, as after nine popular posts of Trailer Watch so have finally made it to ten. A now weekly installment of the latest and greatest trailers around, we've had great feeback about how you love it, so to say thank you for coming by, becoming a friend or even mentioning the site to others, heres are ten trailers from the past 9 editions:

1. Cop Out: Red Band



2. Iron Man 2



3. Inception



4. Kick-Ass



5. A Nightmare on Elm Street



6. Get Him To The Greek



7. Toy Story 3



8. Legend of the Guardians



9. Prince of Persia



10. Hot Tub Time Machine

9 is the magic number!

9 - Shane Acker

With the name of Tim Burton and the director of Nightwatch, Daywatch and Wanted, Timur Bekmambetov placed across posters and trailers, the advertising company behind Shane Acker’s feature length debut 9, have made it clear that these names will draw in more people, but it should be Acker’s name that is bold and clear, because he’s a talent for the future. Famous for short animations, where this feature length is based on, 9 is a superb debut in the animation field, where it looks and sounds like a veteran piece and it’s something new to the genre of mainstream animation. Having a large release in cinemas, it had a chance to showcase a different style of animation not seen before and have a very mature storyline. It’s not Disney or Pixar, it’s a magical world seen through the eyes of creations made by humans. It’s the end of the world, the end of mankind and all that is left are tiny puppets that are left to build humanity. It’s a story of hope and sacrifice and it’s refreshing to have that in cinemas and especially animation, where anything is possible, just look at my previous reviews of Ponyo and UP.

The plot follows 9 robot-like “Stitchpunks” that are trying to survive in the world where everyone is dead except for machines which have come back to life to destroy them. A war between man and machine erupted before they were born and thus the environment around him is decaying and broken. The latest creation 9 meets the rest of them and tries to put right his mistakes and save them from the machines clutches. It has a great build up of action having smaller scenes leading into the main sequence with the queen machine. It has a great ending, sad but defiantly up-lifting. It comes across as having a meaning without shoving it down your throat which sometimes animation films do.

Overall a simple story, which some might criticise as being too simple or not having a deeper meaning to it, but i understand the film, and i understand the decision to not have undertones or sub plots to it. It’s a small package and its nice for a change. The sound here is perfect, i really can’t fault it, from the soundtrack to the sounds of everything including the clogs and material of the characters, everything sounds crisp. Truly a great a job done with sound, but the voice acting is lacking, but mainly because of the script. The action takes centre stage so the dialogue is only used for plot forwarding in parts. Go out and see this film, it’s different...in a good way.

7/10

Simon Childs

Richard Kelly pushed the button.

The Box - Richard Kelly

Richard Kelly’s film history is small compared to directors with the same status in the underground cult groups. His most successful film is Donnie Darko and it seems that his films after that are only trying to achieve the same feel and style whilst using a story that tries to make sense. It’s a common theme from his work, except for writing Domino (which he didn’t direct) which was a big pile of shit. Southland Tales was decent in parts but tried to confuse the viewer into thinking it was intelligent. And of course, Donnie Darko is a superb film, crafted brilliantly, but that’s because it was the piece his career was made on, it had to be good. But now he’s made it, he doesn’t have to try too hard. As i was thinking, Kelly would soon fall into one-hit-wonderum, but instead he fights back with a new film, The Box, starring Cameron (I’ve only made one decent film ever) Diaz and James Marsden.

The plot follows the tale of a couple with a kid who are tested by a man with a box. If they press the big red button on the box, someone, somewhere will die, and they will be given loads of cash for it. Simple premise. Throw in some strange science fiction questions, such as lightning bolts connecting people to other worldly creatures, a man with half his face missing, a town becoming manipulated zombies and base it on questions of human conscious and if a person could really kill, and it’s a good film. It has its random Kelly moments, especially with water, but overall, its questions are in the right place, with the audience being tested. I’m sure at the end of the film, people were asking, would they have the guts to do it. Would i be able to kill for money, and I’m sure most of them would say yes. And i would too. It sounds horrible to think, but then at the same time, i would invest some of that money into a profitable business, get shitloads back and then go to the clinic in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, the one owned by Tom Wilkinson and get my memory erased of it, so then i forgot that i killed someone, and my conscious would be clean. How about that Kelly, didn’t think about that did you!

For a science fiction thriller with horror elements, it’s mediocre; you expect more from a director who got nominated for a shit-ton of awards but as produced nothing like his debut. It’s better than what i thought it would be, with many critics and reviews panning the shit out of it, except for Empire, who i respect as a reviewing system. But it’s simple, it’s a little long, with it being two hours for a horror film essentially, but it feels like a throwback to the old horror from the 60’s and 70’s, where it wasn’t a scare, more of a mental thought.

6/10

Simon Childs

Trailer Watch IX

6th March - 13th March

Welcome readers both old and new, here is another batch of new trailers released for your viewing pleasure. Watch out for next week's batch, as we count down the top ten best trailers so far that we've put up! So every tenth trailer watch, we'll give you the best of the best! We'll be working out which trailer come out the best and reveal it in a weeks time!

And don't forget...PAUL DANO! DON'T FORGET PAUL DANO!

1. Rememeber Me



2. The Runaways



3. The Good Heart



4. Legend of the Guardians



5. Prince of Persia

PONYO, PONYO, MOTHAFUCKING PONYO!

Ponyo - Hayao Miyazaki

I've had the pleasure this week of reviewing three films that i would easily call the best three films i've reviews this year so far! All romantic and gentle films that spring memories of my childhood, my love of life and the wonders of the future. Something i haven't thought about since the last Miyazaki's film, Howl's Moving Castle, and even then, i watched as a double-bill with Spirited Away. That afternoon i felt like a child again and this weekend, i have the same feeling. I think about my future and whats in store. It's a wonderous feeling. Something that Disney and Studio Ghibli purposefully do. I've got the Studio Ghibli collection on DVD and it's a prize possession in my collection, a real die hard fan would have them, and watch them all the time and one day want to be a part of that system, which i want to. I want to be a part of a company who keeps producing high quality films for all ages. As a filmmaker, Ghibli, especially Miyazaki is a major influence on my work, even in the smallest details.

Ponyo, the lastest in the collection, follows the story of Sosuke and a fish-girl named Ponyo. Sosuke meets Ponyo, in the form of a fish and has a deep connection with. After being taken by her father back into the sea, Ponyo wishes to become human so she can be with Sosuke. She uses her father's magic to become human and meets with Sosuke. When she does this, the world becomes unbalanced and storms and high seas begin to appear. Sosuke and Ponyo must go find help and find Sosuke's Mother, which in turns tests the love of Sosuke and Ponyo. It's a simple plot about two people falling in love, and what they would do for each other, but it's told in such a childish manner, that it gives it a basic love feel, nothing sexually or harmful, just pure love for something. It's refreshing to see that. Classic Disney films are full of it, and that's why everyone loves them. It's gives love a pure quality, not like the purity rings and all that jazz, but just love, in it's simplist form. Adult and child will "get" the film and enjoy it. It's that simple. Obviously it's aimed at a younger audience, a little younger than the audience that was there for Spirited Away and Howl's Moving Castle because of the dialogue and action, Ponyo is less dark and scary and more about swooping lines and curvy creatures.

If Studio Ghibli release a film every year forever, i will be happy. I know many of the reviews i do, i almost pointlessly put a film down, saying how shit it is, but with this film, i can't fault it. I go all childish about it, like im a young boy again. I can't make dirty jokes about it. I would give it a ten or even a nine, but it's not as good as Spirited Away which is a 10 and Howl's Moving Castle which is a 9! Bring on next week's shit films! YEAH!

8/10

Simon Childs

I’m still holding onto the balloons of Pixar and never letting go!

UP - Pete Docter

Recalling back to my childhood and watching films with the family, a safe bet would always be the latest offering by Disney. They offered imagination and great storytelling; using intriguing characters in crazy outlandish worlds. Places where i wanted to visit for real and become friends with the protagonists whilst on their journeys. As i became older, these views changed. I watched wrestling, action films, more adult themed television, and i lost my interest in childish adventures with talking animals. I’ve now got to the age where I’m officially an adult. I’m not meant to enjoy Disney and things of that nature. Cute animals and little children. I’m meant to tell it to fuck off. But alas, i don’t. I’ve had a soft spot for anime and animation in general. I’m a whore for it. And i especially love the revolutionary film company that is Pixar. I can stand here and say that Pixar have never made a bad film. It’s one of the only film companies to proudly exclaim it. That all of their releases have had critical success along with the numbers to prove it. I loved Toy Story, Monsters Inc, The Incredibles, Ratatouille and absolutely adored Wall E. And here, in 2009, another Pixar masterpiece was released. One that maybe is their best yet. It’s called UP.

I knew from the opening scenes that UP would use the same system as past Pixar films, but have a new twist, bring something new to the genre. And it did. Even from the opening montage, showing the age change of the main couple, it was frightening sad and genuinely funny. I was moved. And this was only the first five minutes. I was captured. And not a single second did i drop my interest. I was there throughout. Now the film centres around two characters, Carl and Russell, two unlikely heroes, who band together to make their dreams come true. Carl wanting to move his house to Paradise Falls to live out a dream that Carl and his now deceased Wife wanted, he meets Russell, who wants an elderly helper badge and must do anything he can to help Carl. They find an extinct bird that helps them on the journey and the adventure begins. It’s wonderful. Pixar has the knack of having a perfect pace. Not too quick into the action but at the same time, allowing a steady build up for when it explodes.

Some day, when I’m older, I’m gonna show Pixar films to my kids, to give them morals and spark their imagination. I’m not gonna show them television shows that are harmful or make them play violent video games. Children who are brought up on Pixar films are, in my view, better people for it. They learn right and wrong in a safer setting. Pixar films are the bases for so many adults of the generation, who want to change the world, who want to help people and who want to make a difference. Pixar expects the audience to understand on so many levels. Not just entertainment. The films always hit every audience group, from small children to elderly people. It’s not ageist. So please, i beg you, if you haven’t seen UP yet, and think that it won’t be better than Finding Nemo or Toy Story, it might just blow your mind. It’s like The Dark Knight of the animation world. It needs to be seen!

9/10

Simon Childs

Don't tear my Paper Heart

Paper Heart - Nicholas Jasenovec

Looking into the types of films that have been released this year so far, well mostly January and February, the common occurrence of big action films are released around January where most people are off, children from school, adults because of snow or fake illness. It makes sense, and now we are coming into March, Paper Heart is released on DVD, a perfect present for a loved one, maybe if you missed Valentine’s Day or was sleeping with her sister/his brother. It’s a fake documentary mixed with real content, it’s hard to describe, it starts off as a documentary, containing real interviews, but also mixed animations with acting from the main characters in a fake relationship. Charlyne Yi is its main star, the obviously nervous and shy musician and comedian who doesn’t believe in love and wants to find out more, travels across the US to find tales of real love, from gay relationships, 50 year marriages to divorces and Harley riders, Charlyne has some great chemistry with these people, where they describe their vision of true love and when you know you’ve found it.

The film begins to twist a little when Charlyne meets Michael Cera, played by Michael Cera, at a party, and Michael is interested in Charlyne, over the course of the film, by both beginning to see more of each other, in the end resulting in them becoming a couple. Along with this buding romance, various interviews with real people are shown to represent different relationship types, from long marriages, to gay romances, to single people looking for their "one". It's all very sad and a bit soppy! As well as seemingless random animations from Charlyne that are quite quirky and funny. Overall, i thought i would hate it, i thought the romance aspect would make me angry, make me want to smash something and disapprove of this romance bullshit and the idea of love. But i was wrong. I found it likeable. It's something different. It's something that you could take a loved one to see and you would enjoy it as much as her. It's a real surprise. I would recommend it to others just to show more of Michael Cera. And please if you haven't seen Arrested Development, go watch it or just die.

With Valentine's Day been and gone, maybe next year, surprise them with this DVD. Really, do it, you would easily get some lovin' that night! YEAHHHHH!

7/10

Simon Childs

New York, your freaking me out!

New York, I Love You - Various Directors

The sequel (kinda) to Paris, I Love you, ten short films are constructed together along with transitions focusing on various aspects of New York, with the setting and the people who inhabit it. It's certainly different to Paris, some of the abstract elements have been taken away and more interested in different cultures and nationality, which looking at New York, it thrives on. The variety is not the same though as Paris, where each story had maybe a different style or different techniques of telling stories with a twist, well most of the time. Here, the twists are not that twisty at all, except for the piece starring Shia LaBeouf and John Hurt, which is one of my favourites, most of the stories do not have their own story and you'll only realise that they are different when the actors change and sometimes the actors will change but the short film carries on (watch out for the Chris Cooper, prostitute, wife storyline!)

As there are many short films, i can't describe all of them, but my highlights were, from start to finish, the Orlando Bloom and Christina Ricci short about a writer who meets his boss and kinda falls in love, along with the Anton Yelchin and James Caan short about a prom date with a disabled girl, turns into a good night for Anton (wink wink, nudge nudge) and with a great twist too! As mentioned above the Shia LaBeouf and Julie Christie short is shot far differently to the others and has a certain flair which stands out as the best of the bunch, it's hard to describe and i don't want to give away the plot, so go watch it to find out. The rest talk about different cultures, including being Jewish, along with immigrants in New York and how anything is possible.

The film overall does give the impression of New York really well, it gives it that dream feeling, where New York is the best city in the world, where anybody can "make" it. Comparing New York to Paris, i like New York, the city better, but the stories and creativity with Paris is unflappable! I can't wait for the next one, which should easily be London, i bloody love you! Starring Ray Winstone, Danny Dyer and the cast of Eastenders...oh wait, that doesn't sound like a good idea at all!

6/10

Simon Childs

Trailer Watch VIII

28th February - 5th March

Two whole weeks have passed since the last editon of Trailer Watch, so we've thrown in two more extras trailers for you. we feel sorry and this is our whole of apologising. we hope you enjoy...

1. Get Him To The Greek



2. Suicide Girls Must Die



3. A Nightmare On Elm Street



4. Leaves of Grass



5. Toy Story 3



6. Sex and The City 2



7. Kick-Ass

Up and Coming

Readers,

Another exclusive today, a new feature, here at Popcorn Paradise 2010, we like to show people the future, the films and people that in years to come will be big. We bring the latest reviews straight to you, in a down-to-earth, non dickhead fashion (to put it bluntly)...so something new to gaze at is this short film made by Rehan Alexander Mudannayake. It's called Transmission and it caught our eye straight away. So if you would please peep it out, here is the link, you may need facebook to view, but im sure you have!

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=355197686275&ref=mf

Popcorn Paradise x

RANTBOX REVIEW - Watchmen

Readers,

Today marks a new frontier for the site, a new reviewer along with a new format of reviewing, we have finally gone video! So for the first time, let us introduce, the lovely and calm RANTBOX REVIEW! these reviews turn up when they want to, so expect a pattern! They are made by the legend that is Michael Leroi, who one day will be a massive internet sensation, check out his other videos too, so im happy to report that we snapped him up as soon as we saw his reviews of the Zelda series. Here is the first: Watchmen



Simon Childs

The Popcorn Paradise Posse!

Dear Readers,

A quick message from the team behind Popcorn Paradise 2010...

We apologise for the recent lack of writings, but big things have been happening behind closed doors, people getting touted to write and new exclusive content that could be emerging any day now! so please, stay tuned and watch out for more reviews and stuff coming in March, it's going to be a big month for the site, so everyone on facebook, everyone on the internet, everyone around the World, this is the time for Popcorn Paradise to have an army! Which all of you a part of, The Popcorn Paradise Posse! We have a few new tricks which we would like to show you very soon...

So look out for those and have a wonderul day,

Popcorn Paradise x

Crazy old men, gung-ho feds and the unexplainable, explained – a review of “Fringe” Season 1

Fringe

I recently tore my way through the first season of the instant cult classic, “Fringe”. Produced by JJ Abrams, the mastermind behind “Lost” and the latest (and my personal favourite) iteration of “Star Trek” on celluloid, “Fringe” is best described as “X-Files” for this generation – a lot less boring, too. At first, it centres around FBI agent Olivia Dunham (Anna Torv), who is pulled from her standard American post-9/11 terrorism-based assignments into a world of messed-up science experiments gone wrong. The top secret ’Fringe Division’ are tasked with stopping the rapidly spreading wave of unexplainable crimes to do with Fringe Science (the clue is in the title, science on the fringe of belief, not generally accepted by the scientific community... cryogenics, teleportation, mind control, etc), and Anna is drafted after her boyfriend/FBI partner is caught in the explosion of a bomb unlike any other. As he literally begins to go invisible whilst in a coma, Anna is approached by “The Wire” alum Lance Reddick, playing Agent Philip Broyles, who heads up Fringe Division.

Y’know what? I can see myself going on for another 2,000 words just trying to explain the damn first episode of this thing. So I’ll nutshell it – she does a little research into the Fringe division, finds that this strange occurrence (and many others) can be linked back to a former Professor at Harvard, and his old colleague. The Professor, Walter Bishop (the excellent John Noble), is now in an insane asylum, and his colleague is the shady CEO of a shady corporation who always seem to be involved in these messed-up cases. Dunham, to get to Bishop, must contact his son, Peter (a much less annoying Joshua Jackson, long removed from those awful Pacey “Dawson’s Creek” shenanigans) to get to him – Peter being a veritable jack-of-all-trades, holding quite a mysterious side himself. Together, Dunham and the Bishops along with the help of Agent Astrid Farnsworth (relative newcomer Jasika Nicole, a revelation), solve these Fringe cases week by week, all the while trying to peel back the curtain and find out just what is going on with Massive Dynamic, the previously mentioned shady corporation which is headed up by William Bell – Bishop’s old colleague. Just wait till you see who they cast him as – the surprise is an awesome one, especially if you count yourself as a card-carrying sci-fi nut.

Okay, so I said I’d nutshell it, and obviously that didn’t work out too well. Really, the whole appeal of Fringe is watching it for yourself and uncovering all the mysteries as you go along. Each episode is at first an interesting curveball, with cases that range from a baby being born, growing and dying of old age in minutes, to bank robbers who walk through walls - and they only get better as they go along. The whole direction of the series does an about-face just over halfway through, and suddenly the viewer is confronted with what seems like a completely different show. Clearly Abrams knows what he’s doing, because it worked on “Lost” and here, it works again.

The acting is really good in parts and serviceable (at best) in others. John Noble steals the show in every episode, his insane character often having the best lines, with his deliveries making them even better. You grow quite fond of the character, as he is very much a tragic figure with a dark past. Even though he’s not all there, you can see that he very much wants to be, and yearns for his glory days. His arc is definitely one to watch, with a few revelations along the way that’ll leave you speechless and craving more. As I said, Joshua Jackson is much better here than he has been in the past. He actually plays somewhat of a badass, believe it or not. The weak link, which is a pretty big weak link, is Anna Torv. Here she does her best Cate Blanchett impression, albeit with a little edge – but it’s just not enough to be a cut above the rest. She comes off as pretty bland, but I can’t tell if it’s the character or the actor. Then again, this is the trouble with characters such as this, being the point-of-reference for an equally clueless audience. What she discovers, you discover. What information she is spoon-fed, you are spoon-fed. You’ve seen the same character a thousand times – it’s necessary, but in the end she is but a mechanism from which the story flows. As the season goes on her character becomes less important, even if she’s meant to be the main attraction. Hopefully they will find a way to remedy this for the second season.

The budget really helps a show like this – they go all out with the special effects, which one needs with a show of this nature (in my opinion this is where “Heroes” falters – you can’t have a show about superheroes and not show any superhero fights... but that’s another article). The directing is always top notch, although do we ever really notice good or bad direction in a TV show? I digress. There are, as is the norm, filler episodes and ones that really stand out. ‘Bound’ and ‘Ability’ make for good thrillers, ‘Inner Child’ is creepy as hell at first but gains a lot of heart (an oddly stunning combo) and the last two episodes of the season, ‘The Road Not Taken’ and ‘There’s More Than One of Everything’ are equal parts entertaining, thought-provoking, heartwarming/breaking and f*cking cool. Not bad for 40 minutes of telly a piece.

There is one critique, being that each episode more often than not follows the same formula – but when the plot of each episode is so varied, the formula starts becoming unnoticeable.

But like I said – the real draw of the series is the hidden motive/drive of the series – this, you don’t find out until midway through the season. I can say nothing of it, as it would just ruin a lot of sh*t for you, and where’s the fun in that? If you have the time, give this series a proper chance. You might just love it...

VERDICT: 4.5 Pacey’s out of 5! A nice, entertaining way to spend a portion of your evening - curled up with a saucepan full of spag bol, a cigarette and 40 minutes of Fringe!

ALSO SEE: “Lost”, “The X-Files”, “Flashforward”

Dan Woburn

Trailer Watch VII

15th - 22nd February

Afternoon readers, heres another selection of glorious HD trailers for your eyes.

1. Cemetery Junction



2. The A-Team



3. Ong Bak 3



4. A Nightmare on Elm Street



5. Wall Street 2 - Money Never Sleeps

VAUGHAN! BATEMAN! FAVREAU! ... but still a shit film!

Couples Retreat - Peter Billingsley

Every year for the past decade, around Valentine’s Day, studios have been releasing movies that follow the theme of people failing madly in love and all that jazz. Now I’m not partial to Valentine’s Day, it’s a horrible holiday used by companies to sell cheap tacky shit for people who think that one day of the year should be used to show their true affection for someone. Now if you’re one of those people who every year buys a girl flowers, chocolates and stuff, then sadly, i feel sorry for you. I feel sorry that you think its right to only spend one day of their showing your affection. I understand when you’re really young, it gives the illusion of finding true love and being happy, making the idea of marriage a good thing, something you should strive, when in actual fact, it’s not the best thing to do. The idea of marriage is wrong. And you’ve seen the figures, the amount of people getting divorced. And now for this year’s Valentine’s Day, they are releasing a film about having counselling for your marriage, finding true love even in a loveless marriage. Yes, they really have. I know in the cinema that have released Valentine’s Day, a cross breed of an American version of Love Actually and Crash. Sick in my mouth.

Now Couples Retreat, released in the cinema before Christmas, which is a very strange time to release it, it’s finally out on DVD, in the nick of time too before the heavy rush of buying for v-day. It stars a cast of comedic actors, who in their own right, can own a film or television show. But sadly here, they are not used to their strengths. Especially Jason Bateman. I love Arrested Development, even if it was cut short only after three seasons! Bateman was the star of that program, well along with Michael Cera and David Cross. Here he is seen to be the villain of the story, it’s a hard character for him to play, and it’s almost contradicting Bateman in how he acts. You can see that Vince Vaughan is the star of the show, and they need that friction between Vaughan and Bateman, but it’s not needed. Jon Favs gives really good interaction with Vaughan, but that’s what you expect from the Swingers boys. The ladies are a good selection with Malin Ackerman, right off of The Watchmen, as a normal woman, then Kristin Bell, who i adored in both Veronica Mars and Fanboys, here she is majorly underused. And Kristin Davis as the character from Sex and the City; pretty much the same role. And then you have the inclusion of the black family. Almost like they thought it would be a good idea to cover all bases. It’s horrible. I know it’s mostly used for comedy, having a larger man with a younger woman, I’m surprised Eddie Murphy or Martin Lawrence wasn’t ask to play it wearing a fat suit. The film is set on a magnificent island, which is the major reason the actors probably signed up for it. And don’t forget the cameo from the almighty Peter Serefinowicz and Onimusha 3’s Jean Reno. Yeah that’s right, an Onimusha reference to end the review!

4/10

Simon Childs