Did you see that? When his head just crumbled! I just threw up in my mouth...

Halloween 2 – Rob Zombie

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I’m going to just take a breather for a little while. Wow. I’m shocked, I’m utterly shocked. Please go see Halloween 2. It’s fucking gruesome. You don’t expect it to be that bad. Go see the uncensored version. This must be at least 10 times worse than the cinema cut. No way could they add some of the scenes in there. I’ve seen Hostel. I’ve seen Saw. I’ve seen old horror movies, ones where you can’t buy them anymore because of how horrible they are. And I don’t mind them. But this really wants me just to sit down and evaluate film making and most importantly my life. It has scenes that will shock you to the core. The deaths of certain characters in the film are used for effect, almost amped up by Zombie from the first Halloween remake film he directed.

H2 tells the story of Laurie Strode, a year after the massacre by Michael Myers, trying to live her life again and not in fear of Michael’s return. She’s seen to be mentally unstable, having troublesome nightmares and terrors whilst taking prescription drugs to help with her panicked state. Whilst Laurie is getting back on track, Michael is still alive. This time he is having strange visions of his dead mother and is being told to find Laurie. Michael goes on search for her, along the way killing a few innocent people, farmers, strip club owners, strippers, teenagers, police officers; he kills a lot of people to find Laurie. Dr. Loomis meanwhile is publicising his latest book about Michael and what happened in the past. These three stories are interacting to form the backbone to the film, all of them rejoining at the end for the last sequence.

The whole storyline with Michael having a psychological connection to Laurie is very thin bare and isn’t explained well enough. It makes the story into a fairytale almost, the way that they expect the audience to totally understand that they can see each other in their minds, kinda like Voldemort and Harry Potter, but you know; one’s a famous horror film series and the other a kid’s magical tale of wizards. H2 takes away Michael’s unnerving willingness to fuck shit up, but makes it seem pointless, where the kills are random and not inventive, more gruesome. Plus seeing his face slowly starts appearing as the mask begins to disintegrate is a nice touch but Michael is just a mask to me. Same as Jason, all I want from these villains is to stand there, look terrifying, show no emotions and kill to find something. Not just randomly but almost on a mission that they must finish, even if it means killing thousands of children to do it.

4/10

Simon Childs